Subject: REVIEW: MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000: THE MOVIE (1996)

From: [email-masked] (Bart)
Date: 20 May 1996 19:37:16 GMT

MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000: THE MOVIE
                       A film review by Bart
                        Copyright 1996 Bart

Starring: Michael J. Nelson, Trace Beaulieu, Kevin Murphy
Director: Jim Mallon
Rating:   PG-13

Score: 8.5/10

It was a rainy Friday afternoon in Columbus when I persuaded a friend
to see a matinee performance of MST3K:TM. He had never seen any
episodes of the show, and I have watched a scant few, due to its
unsocial airtime on Comedy Central and the uneven nature of many of
the episodes.

For those of you not familiar with the premise, Dr Clayton Forrester
(Beaulieu) wishes to take over the world by finding the worst film
ever made and unleashing it upon an unsuspecting public. To achieve
this, he (in the words of the TV series' theme, which is missing in
the movie) "bumped [Mike Nelson (Nelson)] on the noggin and then shot
him into space", and is monitoring Nelson's reactions to the movies he
is forced to endure. Rather than succumb to the sheer awfulness of many
of the movies, Nelson spends his time making wisecracks with the help
of his two robot companions, Tom Servo and Crow T. Robot. The format of
the show consists of Nelson, Servo and Crow making their comments
while silhouetted against the movie being watched, and breaks every 20
minutes or so for segments set on the Satellite of Love, the ship on
which our heroes are marooned.

Only two things are different in the movie: the absence of Forrester's
sidekick, TV's Frank, and the slower pace of the jokes. This latter
change is presumably deliberate to avoid the viewing audience missing
some of the best lines while laughing from the previous joke. For
their big screen outing, the producers have chosen "This Island
Earth", a 1954 classic, and one of the first SF films to have a
special effects budget larger than the average grocery bill.
Unfortunately for that film (but making it ideal MST3K fodder), acting
and dialogue appear to have taken a back seat to the effects which, by
today's standards, are less than impressive. Nelson & Co. make jokes
about everything from Japan's dominance in the world market, to Star
Trek, to the state of disrepair of Seattle's Kingdome, and most of
them work. Unfortunately, the segments set outside the satellite's
movie theater seem out of place and aren't particularly funny, but at
least they're fairly short.

The big question about this movie though is: Why? I presume it was an
attempt to gain a larger following to keep support behind the series
(rumours of its impending demise circulated for some time before the
plug was eventually pulled a few months ago), but the format gains
nothing from its transition to the big screen -- there are no special
effects to dazzle you, no action sequences to keep you on the edge of
your seat, and no use of digital surround sound. So, it seems
pointless to spend $8 per person to see this movie when in a few
months it will be out on video and you can watch it for $3, and not
have to sit in a room full of popcorn addicts.

Nevertheless, MST3K:TM provides more laugh-out-loud opportunities than
any film you're going to see this year, and I thoroughly recommend it
to anyone with a pulse. Given its uniqueness, I hesitate to grade it
against other films, but it fulfils its claims and so in the class of
"unsubtle comedy films whose laughs come at the expense of bad
B-movies" it does well.