Subject: Review: Lost in Space (1998)

From: [email-masked] (Richard Dickson)
Date: 16 Apr 1998 23:49:47 GMT

Directed by Stephen Hopkins
Screenplay by Akiva Goldsman
Reviewed by Richard F. Dickson

WARNING:  This review contains spoilers for those who have not yet seen the
film.

     The TV series Lost in Space will, to me, always be the Barney Fife to Star
Trek's Andy Griffith.  I always preferred the darker, more serious episodes at
the beginning than the descent into camp the series eventually became.  With
this in mind, I really looked forward to the film version.  Based on what I had
seen, it seemed to have the more sinister tone of those early episodes,
especially where Dr. Smith and the robot were concerned.  Unfortunately, the
film commits the cardinal sin of cinema:  not good, not bad, just ... there.
     Once again, Akiva Goldsman proves that his theory of screenwriting is to
throw as many plots in as he possibly can and hope one of them sticks.  This
failed in Batman and Robin and it fails here.  Any one of these plots -- the
initial launch and sabotage, the derelict ship, and the planet with the time
vortex -- could have been fashioned into a tight, satisfying film, but instead
we are forced to watch this story meander around through three terribly
undeveloped acts.  And he also falls prey to the time travel trap:  he allows
his hero to save the day by travelling back in time to before the Jupiter II is
destroyed.  Now, if this is possible, why not just go back in time and prevent
Dr. Smith from sabotaging the ship in the first place? Yet it's lazy
screenwriting like this that seems to dominate the market these days, writers
being asked nothing more than to dream up a skeleton on which to hang a bunch
of special effects.  Not to mention the fact that this movie seems to be little
more than a collection of variations on scenes from much better movies:  Star
Wars space battles, Blade Runner cityscapes, Alien monsters, etc, etc, etc,
none of them done with any of the style or flair of the originals.
     And beyond the dazzling effects, the movie just sits there.  Never once
was I involved, excited, or stimulated.  Gary Oldman's Dr. Smith is evil
without any real motivation, simply there to provide a threat.  The kids are
all annoying, the parents stoic stereotypes.  The only one who seems to be
having any fun with his role -- and is therefore fun to watch -- is Matt
LeBlanc's Major West.  He seems to understand the idea that this is supposed to
be an adventure, and does well as the dashing hero, despite the awful romantic
dialog he's forced to share with Heather Graham.
    The sad thing is, this movie will probably be a hit.  It has all the eye
candy needed, plus a cutting edge techno soundtrack that will probably have the
kids going back again and again.  But if the series was Barney to Star Trek's
Andy Griffith, this movie is definitely an Otis that should have remained
locked up.

Richard F. Dickson
"Time is an illusion.  Lunchtime doubly so."