Mudparty 2003

 

Editor’s disclaimer: I have tried to read your scribble as well as I could. Some of you were easy to understand, others were complete and utter illiterates, or so it seemed. Anyway, if I got something wrong I’d be much obliged if you’d mud mail me and correct my mistakes. If you have any suggestions as to which words should be put in the empty spots (the […]’s that is), I’ll gracefully consider them. I really don’t care if they are half right, as long as they are interesting and imaginative. While I’m at it I would like to say how much fun it was to meet you crazy people and that I hope to meet all of you, and some new, even crazier people too, again next year. Until then, cheers! Yours truly, Thyme

 

19:00 Fördrinkar. Träffar folk. (Aperitifs. Meets people.)

 

19.05 Pissoar fantastisk. Bra pannstöd. Harthorn intygar vividly. Kastar min log i papperskorg. (Excellent urinal. Good headrest. Harthorn vividly affirms that. Tosses my log in the waste basket.)

 

19.10 Leowon och Gurk rotar i papperskorgen och hittar Harthorns log.  (Leowon and Gurk searches the waste basket and find Harthorn’s log.)

 

19.20 Illegible scribble

 

19.30 “Lepers don’t suck they rott”- Titleist

         Mats: Jah!

 

19.35 Jag sitter intill Mats och mr. Bombadill. -Trevlig! (I sit next to Mats and mr Bombadill.- Nice!)

 

19.45 Sitter och pratar om film Hero!- Crouching tiger… Mats är tyst. (Talking about film Hero!- Crouching tiger… Mats is silent.)

 

19.50 Kingfisher and Poesia say Poesia is a naughty bad girl. “leave my ass alone”

 

19.55 18 pers: 6 har bordsskratt runt Mats. Tystnad utbryter kring oss! Roligt. (18 people: 6        have a table laugh around Mats. Silence ensued! Funny.)

 

20.00 Poesia “I want you to spank my ass and kick”

         “Mats help me”

         “And I want to spank Kurgan”

 

(Here follow some things that were NOT written by Gurk the Master of illegibility.)

 

20.02 Gurk has a thing for spanking it seems. So has Harthorn perhaps…

 

20.03 Poogus clarifies that she does not want to spank anyone and Gurk is projecting his fantasies of spanking Kingfisher (and perhaps the rest of the RTs including Oriole) onto her.

 

20.05 Whispering game: Mats starts with “The power of the leader is in the moustache” and it     goes around the table and ends with “Horny Mortis”

 

20.10 Repo min gamle hotellkamrat gör en bakflip. (Repo my old hotel mate does a backflip.)

 

20.10 Harthorn says “Poogus is in some pretty serious denial obviously”

 

20.12 Repo fell off his chair and stuck his tongue out at the cameras.

 

20.13 Repo started sexually harassing Poogus.

 

20.14 Poogus OBJECTS! Poogus/Poesia also considers certain things that she decides not to mention but she will most certainly take Poogus and zap Kurgans sorry leper ass at all costs.

 

20.19 Gurk has a strange attachment to the log. Harthorn and Poogus think it might be a rare disease originating in the jungles of Antharis.

 

20.27 After much thinking I have found out that you are all weirdos. However, you are nice weirdos. /Thyme

 

20.27 ½ Harthorn didn’t write about me in his log. //Gondorff

 

20.35 Leowon backar i en Lars Norén-dialog (Leowon backs off in a Lars Norén dialogue.)

 

20.40 Bombadill ramlar av stolen när [……] ringer ”Bengt”  (Bombadill falls off his chair when […..] calls ”Bengt”

 

20.45 Rund presentation.  (Round introduction.)  I’m not sure what he means

 

20.47 Random comment from the crowd as Mats stands up “I think he’s Romanian”

 

20.46 Harthorn “cheers to old bananas and [……] “

 

20.46 Discussion about what Poogus should wear while having sex. Slakktor suggests barbed wire.

Slakktor: Have you tried salt?

Soulfly: ?

Slakktor: With the barbed wire…

 

20.48 Malfeithor will PK you anyway.

 

20.56 Mortis (that damn […..] with the good tailor) gets a [….] by Gurk!

 

21.00 On the question about Poesia is a spankable girl. I would like to have her alone tonight. /Teranor

 

21.08 Leo (won) had me between his teeth. And embraced me and had me down and all I could do was zip sip wine and try to stay cool. And play along the game. =) /Tera

 

21.14 Poogus/Poesia will kick all knight haters bootys. I say “Bring it on! Kingfisher has my back (And full support) And let me just say that I *ONLY* censored this because I am a Knightess.

 

21.15 Poog is very knightly; she didn’t write what she said: “I will kick your ass Bombadill, and yours Kurgan, and yours Repo.”

 

21.17 Poogus would like to clarify that she is only half knightess and that her druid half is the one that swears. Poesia would never swear!

 

Poesia is evil.

 

21.32 Leowon and Gurk share hugs and kisses are in the air.

 

21.33 Gurk says: Leowon and people in general should eat the same thing several times.

 

21.34. Everyone respects Mortis, it might be because of his shirt, or “Jag har en liten vit råtta I halsen”. Unclear. The shirt is, maybe, from Canada, the wearer says. And […]!

 

21.33 21.35 No timewarps!

 

21.35 Harthorn [….]

 

21.45 Gurk och Repo grovhånglar vid bordet. (Gurk and Repo are seriously making out at the table)

 

More illegible scribble.

 

(Earlier) Once Slakktor had a couple of wine bottles in a bottle, and then when he checked if they were okay, his hand turned red and stuff.

 

22.02 Poogus is tired of being molested by drunk ass Swedes. (Even worse they are not the right damn Swede) [… something in Russian, I think?…] Aha, try and read that!

 

22.05 Soulfly stinks alcohol and gonna kick your ass anyway.

 

[Some pages of the log are probably missing here]

 

23.41 Gurk has that far away look in his eyes…

 

23.42 Jadea and Leowon agree that licking one’s partner on the ear after 68+ is a good thing.

 

23.43 Kurgan tjatar om mandarin-och-chili-cider. (Kurgan goes on and on about mandarine and chili cider. )

 

23.45 Slakktor ger bort öl till höger och vänster. Han är fullare än en räv (röv?) dansar. (Slakktor gives away beers to everyone. He’s drunker than a dancing fox (ass?).

 

23.46 Teranor is hiding his sissy lady’s drink behind his back in a futile attempt to look more manly.

 

23.47 Teranor säger något. Ingen förstår vad han menar. (Teranor says something. Nobody understands what he means.)

 

23.50 Thyme is having a GREAT time. It’s Thyme-time!

 

23.51 Repo is acting as if he’s on something really nice (could it really be alcohol?), weaving in and out of the crowd like a toy soldier in the Rio carnival.

 

23.52 And fuck you Gurk! (Malfeithor)

 

23.52 Harthorn litar inte på Teranor längre, trots att Teranor levererade drinkar till Titleist och Leowon. (Harthorn doesn’t trust Teranor anymore, even though Teranor delivered drinks to Titleist and Leowon.)

 

23.53 Teranor vaktar Harthorns drink. (Teranor guards Harthorn’s drink)

 

00.07 Found the log at the dance floor. No one here.

 

(Even more illegible scribble.)

 

00.07 Teranor brings the log to the safety of Titleist.

 

00.08 Teranor has not been drinking any salt yet.

 

00.08 Gurk is lost in space(=dance floor) “He’s more lost that me” (Teranor)/ Harthorn

 

00.09 Finally Mortis is coming around. :-)

 

00.10 Leofisk is a true low-down rumourmonger. He’s making up as he goes along.

 

00.11 Slakkie is, if possible, even drunker than before. He’s starting to lose speech.

 

00.12 Slakktor is all “Focused” (yeah, right)

 

00.15 Sausa thinks that everybody should have a tequila and dance on the tables.

 

Sausa & Gurk diskuterar helt vetenskapligt tequila. (Sausa & Gurk is having a scientific discussion about tequila) Leowon observes that Gurk is quite in his real self.

 

00.23 Gurk […] allt som händer så snart som nån, t.ex Leowon, håller i hans näsa. (Gurk […] everything that happens as soon as anyone, for example Leowon, is holding his nose.)

 

00.24 Slakktor och Gurk är som en vandrande ökenstorm ihop. (Slakktor and Gurk are like a walking desert storm together.)

 

00.30 Soulfly skulle köpa Carlsberg hof men var enligt bartendern för full. (Soulfly was going to buy a Carlsberg hof, but according to the bartender he was too drunk.) FUCK THAT BARTENDER! SOULFLY IS NEVER TOO DRUNK. P.s. A real friend is a friend who helps you to drink when you are to drunk to drink by yourself.

 

00.33 Abyssos betygar sin eviga kärlek (käke?) till […] eller Leowon, exakt vilket/vilken är oklart. (Abyssos declares his eternal love (jaw?) to […] or Leowon, which one in particular it is, is unclear.)

 

00.34 Gurk är inne i köket och kollar om det finns vin. En krallig och macho vakt-garderobskille motar ut honom, men det var inte hans fel. (Gurk is out in the kitchen checking for more wine. A well-built and macho bouncer-cloakroom attendant guy pushes him away, but it wasn’t his fault.)

 

00.37 Thyme loves Mats. A lot.

 

00.38 Dagoth hukar som en fisk i saltvatten som har lotionbehandlade fjäll… som en fisk. (Dagoth crouches like a salt water fisk with scales  rubbed with lotion… like a fisk.)

 

00.39 Slakktor klonar sig tre gånger och tror att Mats finns på riktigt. (Slakktor clones himself three times and believes that Mats really exists.)

 

00.40 Gurk dansar på högtalaren. Eller, nej, där är han. (Gurk dances on top of the speakers. Or, no, there he is.)

 

00.41 Thyme menar att konst är något som hittats på hennes vind. (Thyme thinks that art is something that is found in her attic.)

 

(Drawing of modern art, made by unknown artist (probably of the fisky school) and believed to be worth 30 000)

 

00.45 Rammstein är ett tyskt band som har eld, fjällpansar och ser ut som kycklingar, vet nu Thyme. Leo menar att de dessutom gör en bra cover av ”Life is life” (Thyme is now aware that  Rammstein is a German band that has fire, scale armours and look like chickens. Leo thinks that they also do a good cover of “Life is life”.)

 

00.47 1979 med Smashing Pumpkins bör Thyme lyssna på. Den är bra. Dessutom är hon trevlig, säger somliga. (Thyme should listen to 1979 with Smashing Pumpkins. It’s good. Besides, she’s nice, some people say.)

 

*fisken ploppar upp over vattenytan och kippar efter lite luft (*the fisk emerges from under the water and gasps for some air)

 

00.55 Endast en bälta kan en annan bälta välta. (Only an armadillo can overturn another armadillo.) 

 

00.55 There must be more fisk in the life of the occasional and the everyday mudder. /Leofisk

 

00.58 Someone dropped some beer on my pants. There might be some repercussions. /Mats

 

1.05 Rammstein, ein Hertz brennt! (Don’t ask me, I don’t speak German)

 

1.06 Ich fahre nicht über Unterammergan aber immer Über Oberammergan (or something like that, I still don’t speak German. Apart from Jawohl, jawohl, ich liebe alcohol, but that doesn’t really count, does it?)

 

1.10 Leo called me skilled! /Kingy Fishy

 

1.10 Mats repercussions turned out to be a zap, which, surprisingly, fizzled.

 

1.12 Leofisk claims that booze is “slushing around in my brain” and that “entrance is through my ears”.

 

1.13 Titleist är helt nykter! (Titleist is completely sober!)

 

1.15 Gurk tafsar på Jadea. (Gurk feels Jadea up.)

 

1.16 Leowon om Slakktor: Han har bara två armar men han är en hel bläckfisk. (Leowon about Slakktor: He only has two arms, but he’s a complete octopus.)

 

1.17 Titleist provar fransk likör. Mycket god! (Titleist tries some French liqueur. Very tasty!)

 

1.20 Teranor i fosterställning. Försöker utmana Slakktor om fullast på mudfesten? (Teranor in fetal position. Tries to challenge Slakktor for the title of most drunk at the mud party?)

 

1.21 Illegible scribble.

 

1.24 Sauzauza  thinks Kati is a asshole/bastard.

 

1.25 Exxelsior: Wait a moment! I have something in my ass!

 

1.27 Poogus leaves.

 

1.27 Mortis is delusional

 

1.30 Mortis has nipples (Ouch!)

 

1.32 Mortis digs Leos old, long and in-need-of-improvement haircut.

 

1.33 Oriole wonders how many […] it’s worth to dancing to DJ Mendez.

 

1.34 Leo’s got glasses on his mind and in his pockets!!!

 

1.34 Titleist är nykter! (Titleist is sober!)

 

1.35 Jadea gillar inte musiken. (Jadea doesn’t like the music)

 

1.37 Teranor is barfing his ass off.

 

1.41 Oriole klagar på skitmusiken i discot, samma jävla ruttna trackslåtar som för två år sedan. DJ:n har uppenbarligen inte uppfattat att house och techno och drum’n’bass  är de senaste decenniernas dansmusik. (Oriole complains about the crappy music at the disco, the same rotten pop songs that were played two years ago. The DJ obviously hasn’t realized that house, techno and drum’n’bass has been the dance music of the last decades.)

 

1.46 When Leowon speaks in an Irish accent he sounds like a wanker who’d be dead in less than 30 seconds in Scotland, says Mortis. But as long as he doesn’t go there, it’s great. /Mortis

 

1.48 Mortis wants to shag a sheep, or find a cheap shag, unclear which.

 

1.55 Thyme has a really great time (like I said before. Time to say something new perhaps?) Hmm… Alright, everyone here is really boring and stupid and… NOT! :)

 

2.00 Gurk appears on the dance floor and looks like an evil Batman on steroids [……….]

 

2.09 Whizz stole important historic parchment!

 

2.10 Repo thought.

 

2.10 Illegible scribble again (probably about Gurk)

 

2.12 Techno rules the dance floor and Oriole rules the podium. She’s a dancing goddess!…or sumthin’…/ Harthorn

 

2.16. Fy vilken hemsk musik, bara samma trista dunk-dunk. Ge mig lite Håkan H, Blur eller the Streets, så slutar jag vara så gnällig. .. Lev väl! Cajsa (Eww what awful music, the same boring beats all the time. Give me some Håkan H, Blur or the Streets and I’ll stop whining. Live well! Cajsa

 

Första gången här. Ok musik men kunde vara mycket bättre!! /Lina  (My first time here. OK music, but could be a lot better!! /Lina)

 

Hm lite dålig musik just nu, men ruskigt lätt att få napp ifall man skulle vilja det. Men det vill jag inte!!! /Lisa (Hm, somewhat bad music right now, but incredibly easy to pick some one up if one would want that. But I don’t want that!!! /Lisa)

 

2.22 3 babes have been convinced to write in the log just so Gurk could hit on them :-)

 

2.25 After party is in the works!

 

2.30 Runt 2 började det spelas riktig musik. Oriole och Leowon  dominerade högtalardansen. (Around 2 o’clock the real music started playing. Oriole and Leowon ruled the “on top of the speakers”- dance.)

 

2.30 Det tror de ja. Bah! (That’s what they think. Bah!)

 

2.31 Mortis plays fuzzball thinking he’s a god. His performance is on average with the Scottish national…

 

2.31 Dagoth shows considerable skill though.

 

2.33 Harthorn: Det är svårt att vara hjälte. (Harthorn: It’s hard to be a hero.)

 

2.35 Repo: I’m waiting for a girl.

 

2.35 Trying to collect the remains of this Nannyversary… Leo has problems with women.

 

2.36 New pen! 3rd I believe.

 

2.39. Gurk, like a ship captain, is the last to leave the sinking ship.

 

2.40 Heading to Mats’ place for the after party. Titleist, Gurk, Leofisk, Repo, Whizz, Jadea, Mats (GOD!), Thyme, Mortis and Harthorn (official logger at the moment). Oriole wimpied!

 

2.45 Titleist wimpied back just before we got to Mats’ place. Stupendously bad!

 

2.56 Mortis does the Irish thing. Who knows where this will end.

 

3.00 Leo to Gurk (repeatedly): “Give it to me baby”

 

3.04 Repo says: if you want to throw up Gurk, do it through the window or in the toilet or Mats will banish your ass.

 

3.08 Jag testade “det” ikväll och mina nagelband mår tiptop! /Leofisk (I tested ”that” tonight and my cuticles are feeling great!/ Leofisk)

 

3.17 Trots ihärdiga forsök att förhindra det, somnar Gurk in fridfullt. (In spite of vigorous attempts to prevent it, Gurk falls peacefully asleep.)

 

3.35 Repo ringer efter taxi. (Repo calls a cab)

 

3.40 Repo, Gurk, Harthorn, Mortis leaves

 

4.10 Gwen & Poogus är lika så det är inte konstigt. Mindre konstigt än Poogus och Kurgan. (Gwen & Poogus are alike, so it’s not that strange. Less strange than Poogus and Kurgan.)

 

Around 4.30 The last of the mudders decide to call it a night. Left in the apartment are I, your faithful editor, and Mats, your almighty God. Let’s stop here. Night night!