From sleeper@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu Sun Mar 31 01:46:16 1996 Received: from piglet.cc.utexas.edu by soyokaze.biosci.ohio-state.edu (8.7.1/1.950110) id BAA23869; Sun, 31 Mar 1996 01:46:12 GMT Received: (from sleeper@localhost) by piglet.cc.utexas.edu (8.6.11/8.6.11/cc-wf-solaris.mc-1.2) id TAA26394; Sat, 30 Mar 1996 19:46:02 -0600 Date: Sat, 30 Mar 1996 19:46:02 -0600 (CST) From: Yutaka Sasagawa X-Sender: sleeper@piglet.cc.utexas.edu To: mboy-trans@soyokaze.biosci.ohio-state.edu Subject: Re: [MB-MANGA] 4.1 In-Reply-To: <199603290753.HAA11021@soyokaze.biosci.ohio-state.edu> Message-ID: MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: TEXT/PLAIN; charset=US-ASCII Craig wrote: > --------------------------------------------------- > p 6 > > 3 > [View of some trees.] > narration: > The two of them are YASUmi JIKAN toka HOUKAGO > apparently often talking recess-time and-such after-school > in the back courtyard > during recess and after yoku URANIWA 2-RI de > school. often back-court by-2-people > > HANAshite-ru rashii n da kedo > are-talking apparently (explan) but Nitpick, but you're missing a after . > --------------------------------------------------- > p 8 > > 2 > [Meiko turns her attention back to the scene off-panel. Wide-eyed, she chews > on her fingertips.] > Meiko: _____ ____ > Oh, it *would* become this korya uwasa ni naru hazu da wa > sort of rumor! turn-into-rumor-like-this ought-to > > Two beautiful guys... BISHOUNEN 2-RI... > _____ > They're too good of a match NIAi-sugite kowai > so it's scary. match-too-well-(and) scary I think this last line is closer in meaning to the fact that they match the typical description (of two guys in *those* kinds of relationships), at least in stories and manga ^_^, that it's scary. > caption with arrow pointing at Meiko: > Those are the people she so-- yu-- no ga kekkou > pretty much likes (because like-that (nom) (S) quite > she's a literary-minded > girl...) ---> SUki na HITO (BUNGAKU SHOUJO > favorite-person literary-minded-girl > > da kara...) ---> > is that's-why I think refers to the situation, not necessarily Yuu and Miwa. The refers to Meiko, as in "The type of person..." The "litarary-minded" part comes in because it's an oft-explored theme in novels and such, I guess ^_^;; Maybe: "The type of person that likes these kinds of things (since she's a literary-minded girl...)" > 3 > [Miki grimaces.] > caption with arrow pointing at Miki: > People like that are so-- yu-- no ga SEIRI-TEKI ni > physiologically useless. like-that (nom) (S) physiologically > ---> ____ > dame na HITO ---> > useless/hopeless person Again, I think it refers to the situation. And again, the refers to Miki, as in "The type of person..." So maybe: "The type of person that just instinctively can't accept these kinds of things." > 6 > > Miki: [off] > But for Yuu, Arimi-san was YUU ni wa chanto > even his girlfriend, and... by-Yuu (contrast) properly/duly > > ARIMI-san te KANOJO datte > (T) girlfriend even > > ita n da shi... > was-there (explan) and-besides I think this sounds unnatural. Maybe just "But Yuu even had Arimi-san as his girlfriend, and..." > --------------------------------------------------- > p 9 > > 4 > [Miki stands up, rage in her eyes. She clenches both fists and stares ahead > at the scene before her. Meiko, surprised, turns to look at her.] > Miki: > GE-E-EH! ge----_ > > Miki: > I-it's a li-i-ie! u_ uso~~~~! > _ > Stop-p-p!! yamete yoo~~!! > > Meiko: > M-Miki?! mi MIKI!? > > Meiko: > (Now she's turning (kondo AOku natte-ru...) > green...) this-time green/blue/pale is-turning "green with envy"? ^_^;;; I think turning "pale in fear" would be better ^_-. > ===Sidebar=== > FREE TALK (1): > It's been a while. o-HISAshiburi desu, > Yoshizumi here. 1st-time-in-a-long-while is > > YOSHIZUMI desu. > > It's been a half a year 3-KAN kara HANTOSHI-buri no > since volume 3. from-volume-3 after-half-year 's > _________ > yumikkusu desu. > ????????? is > > ^o^ It's ^_^. > _____ > "It might be turned into an "anime ni naru ka mo shirenai. > anime. turn-into-anime it-may-be > > About 80% certain," is KAKU/TASHI(KA) -DO 80% kurai" > what I had heard in a tight/reliable degree extent > conversation with the > editor-in-chief at the to iu HANASHI o HENSHUUCHOU kara > end of August. say-that talk (O) from-editor-in-chief > > KIita no ga 8 GETSUMATSU. > heard (nom) (S) end-of-August I think it's , although normally most people would use ... Nitpick, but is probably or instead. > Beginning around autumn, AKI kurai kara chotto zutsu > little by little, from-around-autumn bit-by-bit > production began, and I > was told at the end of SEISAKU ga HAJImatte, "KETTEI shita > December that "It's been production (S) begin-(and) decided > decided, so you can tell > people." kara HITO ni Itte-mo > that's-why to-person even-tho-say > > ii yo" to Iwareta no ga > okay was-told-that (nom) (S) > > 12 GETSUMATSU. > end-of-December Again, the should probably be changed. > _____ > The true starting date will honto GAPPI no tatsunotte HAYAi > soon be here. the-true-date 's ?????????? swift/prompt > > desu. > is > > --> . comes from the expression , as in "months and days pass". So this is just "Really, time goes by quickly", or "Really, time flies". > When I heard that the NICHIYOU no ASA 8:30, to iu > telecast time is 8:30 on Sunday 's morning say-that > Sunday mornings I thought > for a moment (who would be HOUEI JIKAN o KIita TOKI, > up at that hour?), but telecasting time (O) heard time > children are awake then, > aren't they. (sonna JIKAN ni DARE ga Okite-ru > at-time-like-that who (S) being-up > > n darou) to ISSHUN > (rhet) (quote) an-instant/a-moment > > OMOimashita ga, KODOMO wa > thought but/and child (T) > > Okite-ru n darou desu ne. > being-up (rhet) is (rhet) Nitpick, --> > --------------------------------------------------- > p 10 > > 7 > ______ > Up until now, it's been IMA made wa CHOU- menkui > said that he ONLY goes for until-now super- person-who-only-goes- > looks, or he has terribly for-looks > high ideals, but... > da kara toka suggoku > is that's-why and-such terribly > > RISOU ga TAKAi kara toka > high-ideals that's-why and-such > > Iwarete-ta n desu kedo > was-being-said (explan) but means that he's *really* picky on looks, not that he only goes by looks ^_^. > --------------------------------------------------- > p 13 > > 4 > > narration: > Even though, until recently, konaida made wa NAMAE mo SHIranakute > he was referring to that guy until-lately (T) name too not-know > without even knowing his > name. aitsu YObawari shite-ta kuse ni > that-guy was-calling/naming even-though == "calling him 'that guy'". > --------------------------------------------------- > p 15 > > ===Sidebar=== > FREE TALK (2): _____ > At the time this was turned anime KAsuru ni atatte, > into an anime, it had been anime change-into on-the-occasion-of > said by the editor-in-chief > that, "I feel like I HENSHUUCHOU kara wa "o-YOME ni > got married!" and I was by-editor-in-chief (contrast) to-bride > thinking, wasn't it nice > that he left it to the DAshita to OMOinasai" to Iwarete-mashita > entire staff not to sent think-that was-being-said-that > interrupt the conversation > for anything, and Seki-san, shi, WATASHI wa NANI mo > the producer, kindly and-besides I (T) anything > remarked to me that he > "wants to create something KUCHI o DAsazu ni > as close as possible to not-interrupt-a-conversation > the original author's _______ > wishes," and listened subete sutaffu ni omakase suru no ga > kindly to several of my to-whole-staff leaving-to (S) > opinions beforehand. > YOi n daro-- na, to OMOtte-ta n desu > good (rhet) was-thinking (explan) > _____________ > ga, purodyu--sa-- no SEKI-san wa > and/but producer 's (T) > > "narubeku GENSAKUSHA no IKOU ni > as...as-possible by-original-author's- > wishes > > sou mono o TSUKUritai" > thing-like-that (O) want-to-create > > to osshatte-KUDAsai, iroiro to > (please)-remark-that in-various-ways > > JIZEN ni WATASHI no IKEN o > beforehand my-opinion (O) > > KIite-KUDAsaimasu. > listen-(kindly-to-me) > > ???> It's "to send your daughter off as a bride". If you're the parent of a daughter, then once you send her off to marriage, she's become a member of the groom's family. So you shouldn't get yourself involved in your daughter's affairs anymore. In other words, don't be rowdy in-laws ^_^; ...At least, that's how it is in Japan. For the translation of this whole thing, maybe: "At the time this was turned into an anime, the editor-in-chief told me to think of it as sending off [my daughter as] a bride. And so I thought that it'd be best not to say anything and leave it to the [anime] staff. But the producer, Seki-san, kindly remarked to me that he "wants to create something as close to the original author's intent as possible", and listened kindly to several of my opinions beforehand." > --------------------------------------------------- > p 16 > > 3 > > narration: > But... da kedo > > Taking a cue from Meiko MEIKO to natchan no koto ga kikkake de > and Natchan... about-Meiko-and-Natchan (S) a-clue/a-start/ > an-opportunity I think this may be better just as "Because of the incident with Meiko and Natchan..." > --------------------------------------------------- > p 18 > > 4 > [Yuu still can't meet Miwa's eyes.] > Yuu: > Right now, just doing this, IMA wa ore koushite > and getting to where I can now (T) I do-like-this-(and) > speak with you, Satoshi, is > enough for me. SATOSHI-san to HANAseru you ni natta > with-Satoshi let-speak reached-the- > point-where > > dake de JUUBUN na n da > only is-(and) enough is (explan) A "-san" is missing after "Satoshi". > --------------------------------------------------- > p 19 > > 3 > narration: > Wha... na... > > Wha-- na > > narration: > What was that conversation nan na no IMA no KAIWA > just now? what is (nom) now 's conversation > > narration: ______ > Like last night's drama... yuube no dorama sono manma...... > last-night 's drama that ????? > > Same as , as in "as it is". > --------------------------------------------------- > p 20 > > 2 > > boy 2: > And so, you can't skip to chu-- de > out? = is-called-that-(and) > ____ > fukecha wa ne--? > mustn't-skip-out/cut (rhet) > > == "in the middle of". Maybe: "Why don't we just skip during the middle?" ...I don't think "skip" seems to be the right word when you're sneaking out from running... > --------------------------------------------------- > p 21 > > ===Sidebar=== > FREE TALK (3): _____ > In regards to the anime anime no EGARA ni KANshite wa, WATASHI wa, > character designs, I was concerning-anime's-design (T) I (T) > thinking (it's okay if they > don't look similar; I just (NIte-nakute ii kara > want them done cute...), not-resembling okay > but Umakoshi-san, the art > production supervisor, cares KAWAIku shite hoshii na--) > a lot and is drawing it want-to-make-cute (rhet) > so that it comes close to > the original work, so I'm to ka OMOtte-ta n desu ga, > very happy. was-thinking-that (explan) and/but > > SAKU- GA-/E- KANTOKU no > production drawing supervision 's > > UMAKOSHI-san ga, GENSAKU ni > (S) in-original-work > > CHIKAku naru you totemo KI o tsukatte > so-as-to-come-near awfully care-about-(and) > > KAite-KUDAsatte-te, > are-drawing-(kindly-for-me)-(and) > > tottemo ureshii desu. > awfully happy am It's . > He's also using those FUKUSOU to ka mo > that I drew of clothing and with-dress/garments and-such too > stuff. > WATASHI ga KAita sono manma o > I (S) drew that ????? (O) > > TSUKAtte-kudasatte-ru shi. > is-using-(for-me-kindly) and-besides "He's/She's using the same clothing that I drew, as is." > ________ > (Perhaps they're colorful (tabun karafuru ni CHAKUSHOKU sareru > and turned out a bit perhaps colorfully are-colored > flashier than the image > of the original work, but) darou kara GENSAKU no > the background art design poss that's-why original-work 's > is terrific, too. _______ > ime--ji yori wa chotto HADE ni > than-image (contrast) into-a-bit-flashy > > naru deshou kedo) sore to, > poss-turn but and/with-that > > HAIKEI toka no BIJUTSU > background/scenery and-such 's art > ______ > dezain mo sugoku suteki desu. > design too awfully-wonderful is "(Perhaps, since they'll be colored, they'll turn out a bit flashier than the image of the original work, but) the background art design is terrific, too." > --------------------------------------------------- > p 22 > > 5 > > narration: > All I intended was to get MAketa TOKI wa TAN ni > him to promise not to when defeated time (T) only > he loses! > YAKUSOKU shite-moraenai dake tte > not-able-to-have-promised only (quote) > > tsumori datta no ni~~~~ > intended even-though "All I intended to do is to not have him promise if I lose!" In other words, if Miki wins, Miwa has to promise to stay away from Yuu, but he doesn't have to promise if Miki loses ^_^. > --------------------------------------------------- > p 24 > > 2 > [With grim determination on her face, Miki keeps pace with Miwa.] > > 3 > Miwa: ______ > You won't find it easy to kono pe--su ni tsuite-kuru to wa > follow at this pace. at-this-pace if-follow (contrast) > > nakanaka yaru ja nai ka > -easily do is-not The isn't negation. Maybe: "You're quite good to be able to follow me at this pace." > 4 > Miki: [defiantly] > Please don't scoff at a GEN'EKI UNDOU BUIN o > member of an athletic team. active-service exercise/sports member (O) > ____ > namenai de kudasai > don't-make-light-of-(please) > > Miki: > Considering what your group sotchi koso BUNKA KEI no > specializes in, you're that-way indeed specialization group 's > doing quite well, hm. > wari ni wa > comparitively/considering (contrast) > > kekko-- yarimasu ne > quite do (rhet) refers to all the non-athletic clubs. Miwa is on the student council/assembly, so that becomes his club activity... Maybe: "Considering you're in a non-athletic club, you're..." > --------------------------------------------------- > p 27 > > 3 > > narration: > Jeez... ttaku > ______ > I'd planned to stick to my pe--su o MAMOtte > pace and run at a well-timed pace (O) stick-to-(and) > rate, but why am I going > like this...? TEKITOU na JUN'I de HASHIru tsumori datta > at-well-timed-order to-run intended > > no ni nande konna ME ni... > even-though why at-eye-like-this > > isn't a "well-timed rate" as much as it is just "some decent ranking/order". He just wanted to place in the middle of the pack somewhere, not have to compete for 1st with Miki ^_^. > --------------------------------------------------- > p 29 > > 3 > > Miki FX: > kaku kaku She's knocked out cold, so she doesn't have control over her muscles. I imagine it's the sound of her head bobbing back and forth ^_^. > --------------------------------------------------- > p 32 > > 1 > [He looms over her. Miki, her face flushed, looks up in dismay.] > Yuu: > Maybe I'll do it now. mokkai shichao kka na-- > for-the-present? shall-do I-wonder --> == "once more"/"again". > --------------------------------------------------- > p 36 > > 6 > [Meiko talks to a woman who studies a clipboard. Both sweat and frown.] > caption with arrow pointing at woman: > Public Health Doctor HOKEN-I ---> I think "nurse" would be the equivalent. ---Yutaka