From sleeper@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu Tue Mar 12 20:54:38 1996 Received: from piglet.cc.utexas.edu by soyokaze.biosci.ohio-state.edu (8.7.1/1.950110) id UAA17885; Tue, 12 Mar 1996 20:54:32 GMT Received: (from sleeper@localhost) by piglet.cc.utexas.edu (8.6.11/8.6.11/cc-wf-solaris.mc-1.2) id OAA19166; Tue, 12 Mar 1996 14:54:31 -0600 Date: Tue, 12 Mar 1996 14:54:30 -0600 (CST) From: Yutaka Sasagawa X-Sender: sleeper@piglet.cc.utexas.edu To: mboy-trans@soyokaze.biosci.ohio-state.edu Subject: Re: [MB-MANGA] 3.5 (1/4) In-Reply-To: <199603100257.CAA26575@soyokaze.biosci.ohio-state.edu> Message-ID: MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: TEXT/PLAIN; charset=US-ASCII Craig wrote: > --------------------------------------------------- > p 157 > > 4 > Namura: > Please understand that if FUKOU ni suru to > you do, you'll be miserable. in-misery/misfortune if-do > > wakatte-te > are-understanding-(and) > > I can't take you with me! TSUrete nanka ikenai! > can't-take-along-(and-such) The meaning comes out the same, but the subject of is Natchan, as in "I can't take you with me, knowing that I'll make you miserable/unhappy." > --------------------------------------------------- > p 158 > > 3 > Namura: > You're young and beautiful, kimi wa WAKAi shi > and smart, too. you (T) young and-besides > > kirei de ATAMA mo ii > beautiful are-(and) smart-too > > I'm cherishing the NANI ni datte nareru KANOUSEI o > possibility that you can by-what even can-become possibility (O) > become anything. > HImete-ru > are-keeping-secret/concealing/cherishing Again, the subject is a bit different. It's Meiko that "cherishes" the possibility. The is more like "possesses" here, I think. > --------------------------------------------------- > p 159 > > 1 > [Meiko in anguish. Tears stream down her cheeks.] > Meiko: > Without you, sensei... SENSEI nashi de > > Meiko: > There can be no SHIAWAse ni nanka narenai...! > happiness...! into-good-fortune and-such can't-turn Again minor, but the subject of is Meiko herself, i.e. "I can't become happy." > --------------------------------------------------- > p 160 > > 1 > [With Meiko standing before him, Namura bends down to pick up his bag.] > > 2 > Meiko: ____ > You won't wait for me, ...MAtte-ru no mo dame na no > either? are-waiting (nom) too no-good is "I can't wait for you, either?" > Meiko: > Didn't you tell me itsu-ka MUKAe ni KUru tte > that you'd come for me someday come-for-(a-person) (quote) > someday...? > Itte-kurenai no...? > not-tell-(me) "You're not going to tell me that you'd come for me someday?" > --------------------------------------------------- > p 161 > > 1 > [Meiko's pov of Namura.] > Namura: > I won't say, "forgive me." YURUshite-kure to wa Iwanai > forgive-(me) (quote) (T) not-say I think this may sound better just as "I won't ask you to forgive me." > Namura: [off] > Sayonara. sayonara Is there a reason this is kept as "Sayonara." ? > --------------------------------------------------- > p 163 > > ===Sidebar=== > [paragraph deleted] > > <*Kanji combination is the same kanji for = foot-of-a-mountain plus > the kanji meaning = lord/state-minister.> Sorry, I have no idea how this is read. Especially with names of places (and *especially* those in Hokkaidou) are really hard to read, unless you've heard of them... > I want to go again next RAINEN mata Ikitai na--. > year... the-coming-year again want-to-go (rhet) > > I want to go to Biei, too! BIEI ni mo Ikitai! > to-Biei too want-to-go I'm not sure on this one either, although "Biei" or "Miei" would be my guess also. > [The following two captions have arrows pointing to a drawing of six people > in a chain, each one sitting on the knees of the one in back of them.] > > A sculpture called "Let's "isu ni natte YASUmou" > Turn into Chairs and Rest." into-chair turn-(and) shall-rest > ---> > to iu CHOUKOKU > say-that sculpture/carving > ______ > Yazawa Ai took a remembrance YAZAWA ai wa SAIGO O ni onnaji po--zu de > photo where we were sticking (T) at-tail-end in-same-pose > together in the same pose at > the tail end (^_^). kuttsuki KINEN > stick-together remembrance/commemoration > > SHASHIN o totta (WARAI) > photograph (O) took (smile/laugh) > > <"Kodak moment photo"?> I think that's the best equivalent ^_^. The paragraph is closer in meaning to "Yazawa Ai went to the back of the sculpture and posed herself like she was also part of the sculpture, and had her picture taken like that." Of course, this is too long, so it'll have to be changed to fit. > --------------------------------------------------- > p 164 > > 2 > [Looking worried, Miki looks about. Yuu stares off-panel in another > direction.] > Miki: > W-- ko > ______ > Would it be this platform? kono ho--mu de i-- no? > at-this-platform okay > > Miki: > She's gone already... mou Itchatta n ja... > already went-(finality) The implies that Miki thinks she's gone. So maybe add a "maybe" to the beginning? > Yuu: > I don't know. wakanne-- yo > > Anyway, we'll just go check tonikaku KATAppashi kara MIte-ku > them one by one... anyway one-by-one go-and-see > > shika---- > only ...Which I think is rather odd, since I'm almost sure the Toukaidou Shinkansen leaving Tokyo Station has only one platform (it has two sides to the platform)... ...I guess Yuu and Miki are in such a hurry that they aren't thinking ^_^; Or, maybe Yuu's referring to the individual cars when he says . Although, that makes you wonder why he said that he wasn't sure if it was the right platform... > --------------------------------------------------- > p 173 > > 1 > [Meiko closes her eyes and hugs the books to her chest.] > Meiko: > Certainly... tashika ni > > I remember various things koko ni KUru to iroiro > when I come here... to-this-place when-come several/various > > OMOiDAshichau kedo > recall/remember-(finality) but > > But it isn't unbearable ZENZEN tsuraku nanka nai > at all. entirely unbearably somewhat not-have > > Meiko: > Because they're just nice datte ii OMOiDE bakari da mono > memories. because nice-memories only are reason I think this isn't getting her point across. She's saying that although it does make her remember lots of things, they're all good memories, not bad ones. She isn't saying that everything's just put in the past. > --------------------------------------------------- > p 175 > > 4 > [Filler. A portrait of Miwa.] > narration: [top, in English] > Satoshi Miwa > Horoscope: Sagittarius > Bloodtype: AB > > caption: > So, let's meet him again in de wa, mata 4-KAN de > volume 4 . then/so again in-volume-4 > > o-Ai shimashou > shall-meet-(humble-form) I think this is about Yoshizumi Wataru herself, not Miwa. This is the last sidebar thingy for this volume. > --------------------------------------------------- > p 176 > > 1 > [Yuu turns to quickly survey the entire empty library.] > Yuu: > But... demo... > > Any other seat is... hoka ni ikura demo SEKI wa... > any-other seat (T) > > Umm... ano... > > dramatic FX: > gara------n Couldn't this be , although Yuu and Miwa are there? > --------------------------------------------------- > p 182 > > 2 > > Yuu: [off] > It slipped my mind... KIOKU ni nai... > ____ > I think I was late. fuketa KI ga suru > was-late think/feel I think this is "I don't remember..." "I think I skipped." I think here can be taken to be synonymous with . > 3 > Yuu: > Then, whom did you put down? ja omae wa DARE ni Ireta n da yo > then you (T) by-whom put-in (explan) > > Miki: [brightly] > The current president, of motchiron GEN-KAICHOU > course ! of-course existing-president > > Because he looks so datte KAO ga ii mo--n > goo-o-ood. because face (S) good reason ...So much for awareness of self-government ^_^;; > SEITOKAICHOU to wa... > student-body-president (define) > > Yuu: > ha----_ > > 5 > [Miki's eyes grow huge and wondering. Way behind her, a dude with a '50's > punk-style greasy haircut looks her way.] > Miki: ___ > (Dangerous?) (abunai?) > > Miki: > Hairstyle has nothing to KAMIGATA nante KANKEI nai jan > do with it. hairstyle the-likes-of have-no-relation > > Miki: > The president of Hijiri HIJIRI GAKUEN no KAICHOU nante > school is . wise-man school 's president the-likes-of > _________ > ri--zento da yo > ????????? is > > Yazawa Ai (see below). Possibly = "Isn't Any Angel," > (I think) an ad for which runs at the back of this volume. Don't know what > might be...> You might want to keep as part of the school name, as in "Hijiri Gakuen". I don't remember if Touryou had a Gakuen after it or not, but it should correspond to that. is basically your Elvis-style 50's hairdo, with the hair slicked to the back. The hairdo of choice for highschool punks in Japan (or, at least, it used to be) ^_^. ...I looked it up in my little dictionary (and was surprised to see it in there ^_^), and supposedly it's short for "regent style". According to the dictionary, it's a "hairstyle for men where the front hair is raised high, and the side hair is combed far back" ^_^; And Jeanne wrote: > --------------------------------------------------- > p 173-1 > > >[Meiko closes her eyes and hugs the books to her chest.] > >Meiko: > > Certainly... tashika ni > > > > I remember various things koko ni KUru to iroiro > > when I come here... to-this-place when-come several/various > > > > OMOiDAshichau kedo > > recall/remember-(finality) but > > > I have many memories when I come here I personally think that's kind of odd. I think "I have many memories of this place" would be better, although then it'd no longer literal. I think Craig's original was better. > --------------------------------------------------- > -------------------End of Chapter------------------ > --------------------------------------------------- > > >Scorecard: > > > > Miki <---> Yuu <--- Satoshi > > ^ ^ > > | | > > v | > > Ginta (-?-) Arimi Meiko <-/-> Natchan > > ^ > > | > > | > > Tsutomu Rumi <---> Youji > > ^ ^ > > | | > > v v > > Jin <---> Chiyako > > > >--------------------------------------------------- > > > >Next up! > > > >Miki's worried about the competition for Yuu's affections... And goes > >head-to-head with...Miwa-san??? > > > Oh, geez... surely Miwa isn't really.... 'dangerous'? Very dangerous yo! ^_^ ---Yutaka From jhedge@waterw.com Tue Mar 12 23:21:33 1996 Received: from water.waterw.com by soyokaze.biosci.ohio-state.edu (8.7.1/1.950110) id XAA19856; Tue, 12 Mar 1996 23:21:30 GMT Received: by water.waterw.com (5.65/DEC-Ultrix/4.3) id AA14369; Tue, 12 Mar 1996 18:26:18 -0500 Date: Tue, 12 Mar 1996 18:26:18 -0500 Message-Id: <9603122326.AA14369@water.waterw.com> X-Sender: jhedge@water.waterw.com X-Mailer: Windows Eudora Version 1.4.4 Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" To: mboy-trans@soyokaze.biosci.ohio-state.edu From: jhedge@waterw.com (Jeanne Hedge) Subject: Re: [MB-MANGA] 3.5 (1/4) Yutaka wrote: >And Jeanne wrote: >> --------------------------------------------------- >> p 173-1 >> >> >[Meiko closes her eyes and hugs the books to her chest.] >> >Meiko: >> > Certainly... tashika ni >> > >> > I remember various things koko ni KUru to iroiro >> > when I come here... to-this-place when-come several/various >> > >> > OMOiDAshichau kedo >> > recall/remember-(finality) but >> >> >> I have many memories when I come here > >I personally think that's kind of odd. I think "I have many memories of >this place" would be better, although then it'd no longer literal. I >think Craig's original was better. Well *I* think the original translation is extremely odd (so there :p ) My dictionary gives 'many' as one of the choices for 'iroiro', and 'memory' as one of the choices for 'Omoide'. So that's where 'many memories' in my suggestion came from. Of course, it might not be 'omoide', but 'omoidasu' that I need. And if that changes the whole thing, then how about: "I remember many things when I come here... " Not so different from the original translation (and I still like my original suggestion better), but I think it does work better if you use 'many' instead of 'several' or 'various' for 'iroiro'. Jeanne Hedge jhedge@waterw.com ==================== 75512.1214@compuserve.com "The truth is the one thing that nobody will believe." -- George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950) ============ http://www.accsyst.com/jhedge/main.htm ============